My question to you all is, how can someone fall so drastically out of love in 2 weeks?
I don't think I'd call is drastic. You don't instantly fall out of love. It starts to happen when you see things in a person you dislike and if they add up and become more than the attributes you love in the person, the Romantic love can easily disappear. Falling out of love occurs just as easily as someone falling in love in a day or a week. Love is fickle. Besides, how old are you both? You're probably a young one, relax. You don't need to find the love of your life now. It'll happen. Also, if he's younger than you (like you aforementioned) he's most likely not looking for something serious. He probably just wants a good time.
Anonymous wrote:
Could it be that he suddenly needed space and freedom and felt fear of commitment?
Possibly, or maybe he got to know you better and didn't like what he saw. It's harsh but it's a definite possibility. Don't fret though, there are a lot of other great guys out there. It's not the end of the world.
Anonymous wrote:
What do you all think happened to him?
Nothing really. A change of heart perhaps but that's entirely normal.
Submitted by Anonymous on Fri, 09/23/2005 - 7:31am.
Thanks for your words Sydney. Though I know where u're coming from, things are slightly different I think. I'm 23, and though I am young, I am the kind of person who is comfortable with long-term relationships due to the fact that I take things slowly. I'm not the kind to fall in love in a day, and I don't think anyone really is. We may feel strong attraction, conection, affection, but I think falling and being in love includes getting to know that person's unique traits, physically, mentally and emotionally. That is why when we're in love we adore our loved one's little flaws.
Regarding what u said about him maybe discovering things he didn't like about me, I seriously doubt it, and not because I'm full of myself, but because up to a few days before the breakup everything seemed to be normal. He has always said I englobe everything he wanted in a girl, and I never tried to stop him from doing things he always used to to. I mean, I gave him all the space he asked for. I know he feels great physical attraction towards me, and holds great love and respect toward me, as well as thinking we really click mentally. That is why he was so scared of losing me. I know it's probable he just really loves me as a friend, but I really don't think there was anything I did to bother him.
I really feel he just needed space and time, and I
Thanks for your words Sydney. Though I know where u're coming from, things are slightly different I think. I'm 23, and though I am young, I am the kind of person who is comfortable with long-term relationships due to the fact that I take things slowly. I'm not the kind to fall in love in a day, and I don't think anyone really is. We may feel strong attraction, conection, affection, but I think falling and being in love includes getting to know that person's unique traits, physically, mentally and emotionally. That is why when we're in love we adore our loved one's little flaws.
Regarding what u said about him maybe discovering things he didn't like about me, I seriously doubt it, and not because I'm full of myself, but because up to a few days before the breakup everything seemed to be normal. He has always said I englobe everything he wanted in a girl, and I never tried to stop him from doing things he always used to to. I mean, I gave him all the space he asked for. I know he feels great physical attraction towards me, and holds great love and respect toward me, as well as thinking we really click mentally. That is why he was so scared of losing me. I know it's probable he just really loves me as a friend, but I really don't think there was anything I did to bother him.
I really feel he just needed space and time, and I
Submitted by Anonymous on Sat, 09/24/2005 - 2:22am.
Hi Syd,
Though it is hard, I am trying to move on. But I also think one must keep the faith at least for a while. take that time to get back on my feet, renew myself, recover things I left aside. That is what I am trying to do and though I have my ups and downs, I'm holding it together. Why? because I feel there is still a chance. I haven't called or messaged him at all. When the time comes, I'll see how I feel and how he feels. Whatever happens, these first few weeks of agony I will have gone through, so I think I'll be pretty toughened up. Even if he doesn't wanna get back together, the blow won't be as hard.
I know exactly what u are saying about him not being with me, but what I try to explain is that there are other possibilities too, people can make mistakes or make mistakes. It might not be his case, but I know for certain that if I play my cards right I can get him back.
I think at least in the beginning it is OK to have faith and hope, as long as u don't feed it in excess. If one keeps themselves away from that person, and takes the time to find themselves again, perhaps that little spark that attracted your partner in the first place can be lit again. I just feel there are things to be lived yet, and my intuition is right most of the time.
However, i am going out with friends, not closing any doors, and being patient. That is the hardest part.
Thanks for your words though, I would have agreed with u entirely if it was regarding my first boyfriend, who was an asshole.
Though it is hard, I am trying to move on. But I also think one must keep the faith at least for a while. take that time to get back on my feet, renew myself, recover things I left aside. That is what I am trying to do and though I have my ups and downs, I'm holding it together. Why? because I feel there is still a chance. I haven't called or messaged him at all. When the time comes, I'll see how I feel and how he feels. Whatever happens, these first few weeks of agony I will have gone through, so I think I'll be pretty toughened up. Even if he doesn't wanna get back together, the blow won't be as hard.
I know exactly what u are saying about him not being with me, but what I try to explain is that there are other possibilities too, people can make mistakes or make mistakes. It might not be his case, but I know for certain that if I play my cards right I can get him back.
I think at least in the beginning it is OK to have faith and hope, as long as u don't feed it in excess. If one keeps themselves away from that person, and takes the time to find themselves again, perhaps that little spark that attracted your partner in the first place can be lit again. I just feel there are things to be lived yet, and my intuition is right most of the time.
However, i am going out with friends, not closing any doors, and being patient. That is the hardest part.
Thanks for your words though, I would have agreed with u entirely if it was regarding my first boyfriend, who was an asshole.
Thanks again.
Good. See, I'm not saying there isn't any possibility in the future but think about it, if he dumped you for whatever reason and then realized it was a mistake, would you want him back? If you really love him, sure, go for it and if not, you have realized that you are entitled to partner who confidently wants to be with you. You deserve that, you really do. But with all of this stated, you still shouldn't contemplate this day or night. The future isn't up to him or you, it just happens. You just have to go with the flow. So, instead of thinking about the ifs, buts and whens, continue to enjoy your life with your friends, withOUT the ex and be happy. Because ultimately, that's all you can do and if you're not happy alone, how can you be happy with someone else?
Submitted by Anonymous on Sat, 01/14/2006 - 4:41pm.
Hi,
That guy was not meant for you. If you want to find a good match, find one 4, 8, 12, or 16 years older than you. And that advice is good for anybody. You'll see what i mean by 'good match' when it happens :)
My question to you all is, how can someone fall so drastically out of love in 2 weeks?
I don't think I'd call is drastic. You don't instantly fall out of love. It starts to happen when you see things in a person you dislike and if they add up and become more than the attributes you love in the person, the Romantic love can easily disappear. Falling out of love occurs just as easily as someone falling in love in a day or a week. Love is fickle. Besides, how old are you both? You're probably a young one, relax. You don't need to find the love of your life now. It'll happen. Also, if he's younger than you (like you aforementioned) he's most likely not looking for something serious. He probably just wants a good time.
Could it be that he suddenly needed space and freedom and felt fear of commitment?
Possibly, or maybe he got to know you better and didn't like what he saw. It's harsh but it's a definite possibility. Don't fret though, there are a lot of other great guys out there. It's not the end of the world.
What do you all think happened to him?
Nothing really. A change of heart perhaps but that's entirely normal.
Thanks for your words Sydney. Though I know where u're coming from, things are slightly different I think. I'm 23, and though I am young, I am the kind of person who is comfortable with long-term relationships due to the fact that I take things slowly. I'm not the kind to fall in love in a day, and I don't think anyone really is. We may feel strong attraction, conection, affection, but I think falling and being in love includes getting to know that person's unique traits, physically, mentally and emotionally. That is why when we're in love we adore our loved one's little flaws.
Regarding what u said about him maybe discovering things he didn't like about me, I seriously doubt it, and not because I'm full of myself, but because up to a few days before the breakup everything seemed to be normal. He has always said I englobe everything he wanted in a girl, and I never tried to stop him from doing things he always used to to. I mean, I gave him all the space he asked for. I know he feels great physical attraction towards me, and holds great love and respect toward me, as well as thinking we really click mentally. That is why he was so scared of losing me. I know it's probable he just really loves me as a friend, but I really don't think there was anything I did to bother him.
I really feel he just needed space and time, and I
Thanks for your words Sydney. Though I know where u're coming from, things are slightly different I think. I'm 23, and though I am young, I am the kind of person who is comfortable with long-term relationships due to the fact that I take things slowly. I'm not the kind to fall in love in a day, and I don't think anyone really is. We may feel strong attraction, conection, affection, but I think falling and being in love includes getting to know that person's unique traits, physically, mentally and emotionally. That is why when we're in love we adore our loved one's little flaws.
Regarding what u said about him maybe discovering things he didn't like about me, I seriously doubt it, and not because I'm full of myself, but because up to a few days before the breakup everything seemed to be normal. He has always said I englobe everything he wanted in a girl, and I never tried to stop him from doing things he always used to to. I mean, I gave him all the space he asked for. I know he feels great physical attraction towards me, and holds great love and respect toward me, as well as thinking we really click mentally. That is why he was so scared of losing me. I know it's probable he just really loves me as a friend, but I really don't think there was anything I did to bother him.
I really feel he just needed space and time, and I
Hi Syd,
Though it is hard, I am trying to move on. But I also think one must keep the faith at least for a while. take that time to get back on my feet, renew myself, recover things I left aside. That is what I am trying to do and though I have my ups and downs, I'm holding it together. Why? because I feel there is still a chance. I haven't called or messaged him at all. When the time comes, I'll see how I feel and how he feels. Whatever happens, these first few weeks of agony I will have gone through, so I think I'll be pretty toughened up. Even if he doesn't wanna get back together, the blow won't be as hard.
I know exactly what u are saying about him not being with me, but what I try to explain is that there are other possibilities too, people can make mistakes or make mistakes. It might not be his case, but I know for certain that if I play my cards right I can get him back.
I think at least in the beginning it is OK to have faith and hope, as long as u don't feed it in excess. If one keeps themselves away from that person, and takes the time to find themselves again, perhaps that little spark that attracted your partner in the first place can be lit again. I just feel there are things to be lived yet, and my intuition is right most of the time.
However, i am going out with friends, not closing any doors, and being patient. That is the hardest part.
Thanks for your words though, I would have agreed with u entirely if it was regarding my first boyfriend, who was an asshole.
Thanks again.
ooops...
"people can make mistakes or get confused" is what I meant.
Sorry!
Hi Syd,
Though it is hard, I am trying to move on. But I also think one must keep the faith at least for a while. take that time to get back on my feet, renew myself, recover things I left aside. That is what I am trying to do and though I have my ups and downs, I'm holding it together. Why? because I feel there is still a chance. I haven't called or messaged him at all. When the time comes, I'll see how I feel and how he feels. Whatever happens, these first few weeks of agony I will have gone through, so I think I'll be pretty toughened up. Even if he doesn't wanna get back together, the blow won't be as hard.
I know exactly what u are saying about him not being with me, but what I try to explain is that there are other possibilities too, people can make mistakes or make mistakes. It might not be his case, but I know for certain that if I play my cards right I can get him back.
I think at least in the beginning it is OK to have faith and hope, as long as u don't feed it in excess. If one keeps themselves away from that person, and takes the time to find themselves again, perhaps that little spark that attracted your partner in the first place can be lit again. I just feel there are things to be lived yet, and my intuition is right most of the time.
However, i am going out with friends, not closing any doors, and being patient. That is the hardest part.
Thanks for your words though, I would have agreed with u entirely if it was regarding my first boyfriend, who was an asshole.
Thanks again.
Good. See, I'm not saying there isn't any possibility in the future but think about it, if he dumped you for whatever reason and then realized it was a mistake, would you want him back? If you really love him, sure, go for it and if not, you have realized that you are entitled to partner who confidently wants to be with you. You deserve that, you really do. But with all of this stated, you still shouldn't contemplate this day or night. The future isn't up to him or you, it just happens. You just have to go with the flow. So, instead of thinking about the ifs, buts and whens, continue to enjoy your life with your friends, withOUT the ex and be happy. Because ultimately, that's all you can do and if you're not happy alone, how can you be happy with someone else?
Hope that helped. Take care hun.
Hi,
That guy was not meant for you. If you want to find a good match, find one 4, 8, 12, or 16 years older than you. And that advice is good for anybody. You'll see what i mean by 'good match' when it happens :)
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