A constant source of confusion for young guys is why women won't sleep with nice guys. Worse, the website Hot Chicks With Douchebags is hard proof that hot chicks will do anything—even awesomely immoral, degrading things—with total douchebags.

The fact that hot women are idiotically masochistic is constantly one of our site's highest trafficked pages. It's such a truism that it borders on the cliché. Yet it totally contradicts everything parents and society tell young men. Why? Because society tries to promote a false reality, mothers are delusional liars, and fathers are, almost by definition, successful douche-bags.

By telling you the lie that "women like nice guys," Mothers are just trying to save the girls you date from the same fate as hers (and to avoid coming off like the whores they are).

Fathers, on the other hand, let you believe the lie—even though it never worked for them—because, why should YOU have a leg up? They had to learn it the hard way, and they figure, so should you. Like we said, they're douche-bags.

So instead of listening to advice from your whore of a Mom or your passed-out drunk Dad, just watch the mediocre TV sitcom, "How I met your mother" and pay close attention to what Neal Patrick Harris' character, Barney, says—he's the guy without a vagina—because he's 100% right about everything.

In the meantime, just read our explanation of "How to be an asshole."