Don't Take It Personally: The Art of Dealing With Rejection.

Unless you truly are God's gift to women, you might as well get used to the idea that, in your dealings with the opposite sex, you will get the “Let's be friends” speech. A lot. You'll have to accept the fact that you are not every girl's ideal mate, regardless of what your Mom told you. There will be times when women will laugh at the thought of dating you. They will mock you in public. They will throw their drinks in your face. They may even kick you in the package. Repeatedly. That's the price men pay for putting their ass on the line.

How to deal with getting dumped. Hint: it's not therapy.

So why do men do it? Because testosterone makes men horny. And horny men are ballsy men. And by ballsy, we don't mean brave, bold or gutsy. We mean desperate, reckless and dumb. Dumb enough to keep trying even after being laughed at, mocked and kicked in the package.

1001 Insults, Put-Downs, and Comebacks The very sharpest of these barbs.

Yet without desperate, reckless and dumb men, cockroaches would be polluting this planet instead of us. So hold your head up high (as soon as that throbbing stops) for you are Mankind's noble hero and sole salvation. Be proud. And rise above it.

Still, if you want to maintain a shred of self-respect after a woman trashes you in front of your peers, you need a killer comeback. And since you can never think of a good exit line after a woman shoots your down, here are a few you might remember to blurt out before you slink away, red-faced and balling like a child.

• 1.) “Well then, I guess a blow job is out of the question.”
• 2.) “It's just as well, that saves me a trip to the Free Clinic.”
• 3.) “Too bad. Your skin would've made a nice addition to my collection.”
• 4.) “Oh, I'm sorry, I mistook you for a female.”
• 5.) “Oh, I get it. Sorry, let me start again....So, how much?”

Then run.