“Open marriage isn’t cheating,” says expert to knife-wielding spouse.

Does getting a little strange on the side mean don’t love your spouse? Is fucking someone you’re not married to grounds for divorce? Does the need for sexual variation justify an unintended appearance on the TV show COPS? The answer might surprise you.

Openly gay columnist, Dan Savage, opened Pandora’s box recently by suggesting that heteros might want to loosen up their definition of monogamy.

He suggested that “My partner’s fidelity to me is as important as anyone who’s in a monogamous relationship with someone else; we just don’t define sexual exclusivity as the be-all and end-all of commitment. In other words, we’re faithful to each other, but sometimes we have sex with other people. However, that in no way violates our commitment to each other.”

mo·nog·a·my n. The practice of having a single sexual partner during a period of time or until someone hot lets you bang them.

No doubt, Arnold would heartily agree with that definition, as would most men.

So is it just women that are the prudes? Is it because their emotions are so wrapped up in the sexual act that they can’t bear to share their mates?

Probably not. Lots of females in the animal world are total whores. And lots of males are faithful to one mate (well, maybe not lots of them). So there’s not really a ton of precedent for monogamy as a natural state.

Personally, I think monogamy is like durian fruit. If you grow up with it, you like and accept its vile nastiness.

But if you don’t grow up with it, you don’t have a strong compulsion to work it into your life.

Sadly, “open” marriages probably won’t ever work until enough of both sexes are raised to believe that monogamy is entirely optional.

Or until the Mormon’s get all “fundamental” again.

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speaking of animal,i love them.your post inspired me a little bit.


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