You any good in bed? Find out how to not suck in the sack.

A lot of people think that what makes someone good in bed is their looks – so they hit the gym to work off their last big meal (or hit the bathroom to throw it up). But a tight ass and/or hard abs aren’t what make some people better in bed. No, it’s something else entirely.

People always say that “the brain is the sexiest organ,” and while they’re not wrong, they’re also not people you’d want to spend any time with, let alone fuck. The people who say that kind of shit are usually just rationalizing the fact that they’re so ugly they couldn’t get laid at a Sex Addicts support group.

And that’s a shame, though, because they really could be the best lay you’ve ever had (and not just because they’d be so thankful).

There’s a cliche out there that good-looking people don’t try in bed, and it’s true. Really attractive people think that just being hot looking is enough. And it is, for the first few screws.

Attractive people are so concerned with, and put so much effort into, looking good that they feel they can “phone it in” in the bedroom. It’s one of the reasons why people always say not to marry a beautiful person. Fuck them, sure, but don’t marry them.

Vanity is an excitement killer. Sure, the first time you fuck a beautiful person it will be epic – the sheer accomplishment and feeling of success you get will ensure that you don’t last long. That “Holy shit, I can’t believe I’m fucking this super hot person” feeling is hard to beat, but it’s shockingly short-lived.

Sex with a person you only like physically quickly becomes boring, fast. Why? Because you’ve already been there, done that. Now, you’re fucking the person instead of the fantasy.

Past a certain point, looks simply don’t play a big part in how good someone is in bed. If you’re mostly normal looking, what really matters in the sack is 1.) your sexual personality, and 2.) your sexual chemistry with the other person.

When your clothes come off, it’s all about your attitude and enthusiasm for having sex with the particular person. If you aren’t totally into screwing this person, you’re gonna suck. And if they aren’t totally into getting screwed by you, you’re gonna suck even harder. But if you’re both totally into screwing each other, you’re both gonna be amazing.

Thanks to the subjective nature of sex, you can be objectively terrible in bed and still have partners tell you that you’re awesome in bed with a straight face and mean it.

Why? Because horny people are stupid people.

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