The madness: Why guys are such sick bastards.

What happens when a guy gets so horny, he starts losing his freaking mind? The Madness strikes. It's what's behind all those weird sex stories you hear about. Like the guy with his Johnson caught in the pool jet. Or the guy caught humping the vacuum cleaner. It explains the popularity of strip clubs, 976 phone numbers and Pregnant Cheerleader magazines. When a guy is seriously horny, even the most unsanitary, disgustingly perverse idea sounds like a good one.

Guys are sex machines. And when they don't get it, they go a little nuts (ask any woman in a long term relationship).

The instinct to reproduce is very strong in males, and with every passing day, it gets stronger. (Apparently, whoever started this world didn't want to take ANY chances on the human species dying out from a lack of trying.) A horned-up male gets a small voice in the back of his head that says things like, "I bet that hole in tonight's Cornish hen is about the same size as your dick." And that's all it takes. (Maybe that's why men are so good at spatial relations.) Next thing you know, he's "surprising" you by taking you OUT to dinner tonight.

Guy's are thoughtful like that.

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Put a horny guy alone in a room for too long and the pets will be hiding under the sofa when you come home.

The Madness is also what makes otherwise sane men lie. They will say and/or do anything to get sex and rid himself of The Madness. That's why the only time a man will tell you the truth is immediately after he orgasms.

You know, before he falls asleep...

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Comments

Guys are just big dumb pieces of farm machinery. You know the sowing their seeds deal. oh forget it then.

You, girls, are then just big, dumb as dirt, plots of land to plow, fertilize and make fruitful. That’s quite a match, actually.

Women think we are far more complicated than we are….. that’s how we slip under their radar. They are too busy trying to figure out the “complicated and devious plan” they think we all have. Men are like mice and mousetraps…..”mmmmm……CHEEESE!” ARGH!!!!! MY HEAD! We see something we want, we go straight to it. -The Doctor

My man cannot anD has not for 20 years, nor has any man ever been able to keep up with my sexual desires or acts. Not boasting , shit yes I am, but that does make my husband any less than a man, IT JUST MEANS I NEED MORE LOTS MORE !!!

You are just wanting attention. This is the WOMAN’S guide. WOMAN don’t want to know how much sex you need to “fufill” your needs. Unless you’re a lesbian, quit trying to attract attention.

Hey, I like sex all the time too, so there! And I like sex with men, on men, anywhere men! Let me rephrase, one man at a time. Problem is, I get wrapped up in one man at a time, the biology kicks in and I feel a need to commit, nine times out of ten, the man doesn’t, or deep down thinks I am “loose”… or he’s just not that into me. That hurts. I can’t and never have been able to play a man, either he gets it or not…and I am still waiting for the right one….drag.

My x-old man cheated a lot, without my knowledge. He bugged me for sex every night and I suppose on the nights he cheated. It’s obviously because he was a sex crazed animal machine. He LOVED Trannies. That’s how they are. Every guy I met, now, dating, are ALL into kinky, bizarre sex acts.

I know, right? Then if you dont like their kinky bizarre sex habits, something is wrong with YOU. Men never think they do anything wrong.

My ex-boyfriend didn’t touch me for 2 years. That’s a long time to go without sex. I dumped him.

Either your really really ugly, he’s gay, he was cheating and hence with you for some other reason, or he’s mentally insane. ALL guys want sex. No exceptions.

Men are deceitful lying sluts who will do or fuck anything just to get off. It sickens me that girls can’t see through their bullshit and end up being tossed aside like a hour (or a minute) old condom. Fucking bastards.

infact, theyll stoop to the level where theyll take advantage of their drunk best friend who trusted him to take care of her if she got smashed. its seriously time for all us girls to take a step forward n ruin their fuckin lives. i think forcing them to watch porn with their hands tied behind their backs seems like a good idea.

Visitor wrote:
infact, theyll stoop to the level where theyll take advantage of their drunk best friend who trusted him to take care of her if she got smashed. its seriously time for all us girls to take a step forward n ruin their fuckin lives. i think forcing them to watch porn with their hands tied behind their backs seems like a good idea.
If you’ll suck me off while I’m tied, I’m down if you’re down.

I don’t have these problems. My man gets sex when he wants it and dislikes porn. The closest he gets is written erotica occasionally. But then again, being 26, his need to ‘outlet’ that monster is very infrequent. Sudden, intense, but infrequent compared to his younger days. He’s more concerned with his hobbies and things than sex nowadays. But I dated a lot of guys like that. I did a lot of ‘shopping’ if you will, or ‘test driving’ and found that men -do- tend to be exactly like this^. Hallelujah I got lucky.

I’m 19 and I’m horny 24/7 I jerkoff probably 4 times a day idk I lose count a lot. I think about sex almost always.

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