Section 2: About chicks

Section 2: About chicks

Most guys will agree that many women suck (just not in the fun way). Still, if you wanna get your rocks off, what other choice do you have? Right? Well, actually, there are other “outlets” available to the sexually active human male:

First, you can have sex with yourself — masturbation is quick and convenient, albeit messy. Even at its best, though, it’s only a stop-gap measure. Eventually, you’re going to need a real woman, regardless of the degree of difficulty.

Second, there’s sex with just that, a real woman: A potentially excellent feeling experience — depending on the girl’s “hotness” — but fraught with emotional baggage, mind-games, STDs and unintended fatherhood. Despite these massive drawbacks, it’s still the most popular option going.

Third, you could have sex with another man. Historically, it’s been a popular avenue (no pun intended) for Greeks, Romans and frustrated prison inmates. And while easier to instigate — from what we hear — homo-sex is much harder to block from your mind the next morning (and for the rest of your life). Perhaps the biggest downside is that your date has a cock. And for most guys, that’s one too many.

Finally, there’s sex with an animal. But we don’t recommend it for a number of reasons, least of which is the difficulty in getting a goat into a garter belt and stockings. That feat notwithstanding, bestiality is non-consensual, illegal, and morally wrong. Plus, it demonstrates a level of sexual desperation more obvious to women than your mutant Neanderthal uni-brow. So you might want to stick with one of the first three options.

If you eliminate choices #3 and #4 on the grounds that you’re heterosexual and not from the Deep South, you might as well make peace with the fact that you’re gonna have to learn to deal with chicks.

Or buy hand-lotion from a bulk warehouse store. It’s your choice.

Your rating: None (9 votes)

this site is shit

this site is shit

this site ROCKS!

I think this site is hilarious. not just hilarious, but nearly everything they say is - sorry to say (cause I'm a girl)- true!
I'm not bitter or jaded but I agree with most of what is here.
it's educational. and they're right. you clearly can't handle the TRUTH!!
ROCK ON!!

he meant to say 'the' shit

but hes from BR or something

No girlfriend, no troubles.

My last sexual relationship was the 14th of august 2002. I've been on irregular masturbation for the last 7 years. My friends call me the vicar. Bad dates after bad dates, first i get stuck to not going back, no matter how growing the urge. You get used to it and the need gets less strong after 3-4 years. Maybe my sex drive is not as strong, but i am still sane, the desire is still here, but i think with my upper head before the lower one easier. 99.99% of men would say i am lying and that this is no life. Some monks in China live in mountains and break rocks all their life, go and tell them they have "no life".

this site is the saviour of

this site is the saviour of all men fucked ova by women or all men jus about to be fucked ova by a woman

Option 4

Personally I think an animal is a good choice LOL and its also not illegal in quite a few countries. :D

you forgot to mention

you forgot to mention fleshlights :p

you forgot to mention the best option.. prostitution!

Men, if you consider how much hassle and money you MUST invest in a woman today just to have sex, well the best option is: Prostitution! the reasons why?
1) you may choose the chicks you like!
2) you know what you'll have for sure when you pay
3) prostitute cost as a dinner, the "little" difference is that whit the cost of a "dinner" with women you are not sure to score, with them this is totally sure! no hidden fees!
4) ...and you see what you get! in many women you don't!
5) If sex hillness with a prostitute is a problem, ask yourself why today you MUST use condoms with "normal" women too!
6) many prostitutes may give you the same emotional sensations as your lovely lady daily gives to you between a "dear" and "honey"
8) you may have all the channels you wish with a prostitute, many "normal" women don't like that you "see" some channel..(until you are not the horny plumber they fuck while you are at work, of course!)
7) both of them get money in the process.. but when the game it's over, only one want from you home, assets and money! guess who?

end of the line: DO NOT MARRY until eneven laws and chicks will change! otherwise.. you will be the only one to be fucked hard!

(Non-)Option 2....

If you choose this non-option, NEVER go with a coworker! The others will get jealous until the inevitable breakup. Then the one you went with will blab everything and make stuff, smearing you.

Another option...

...is sex with women, but without any baggage. You do this by only having short-term relationships. Once the excitement of a new woman starts to wane, you move on. It's not that hard, you just stop calling and they'll break up or they'll freak out and then you break up.

Believe it or not, this is what women of today want, it's one of the things they've been fighting for by wanting more sexual freedom. Women don't want to be the gatekeepers of sex any more, and I think that's great. Who doesn't love sluts? I love them, I absolutely love them... I just would never marry one or let one get me down.

Now, the important thing is that there's a quid pro quo that men have to remember. If woman want to shed their sexual gatekeeper responsibilities, then men no longer have to feel responsible as the gatekeepers of commitment.

Just remember, always use condoms, even if she says she's on BC.

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