Section 2: About chicks

Most guys will agree that many women suck (and not in the fun way). Still, if you wanna get your rocks off, what other choice do you have, right? Well, actually, there are other “outlets” available to the sexually active human male:

First, you can have sex with yourself — masturbation is quick and convenient, albeit sometimes messy. Even at its best, though, it’s only a stop-gap measure. Eventually, you’re going to need a real woman, regardless of the degree of difficulty.

Second, there’s sex with just that, a real woman: This is a potentially excellent feeling experience — depending on the girl’s “hotness” — but can be fraught with emotional baggage, mind-games, STDs and unintended fatherhood. Yet, despite these massive drawbacks, it’s still the most popular option going.

Third, you could have sex with another man. Historically, it’s been a popular avenue (no pun intended) for Greeks, Romans and frustrated prison inmates. And while man-sex is easier to instigate — from what we hear — it’s much harder to block from your mind the next morning (and the rest of your life). Perhaps the biggest downside is that your date has a cock, and for most guys, that’s one cock too many.

[[ad|group=171]]

Finally, there’s sex with an animal. But we don’t recommend it for a number of reasons, least of which is the difficulty in getting a goat into a garter belt and heels. That feat notwithstanding, bestiality is non-consensual, illegal, and morally wrong. Plus, it demonstrates a level of sexual desperation more obvious to women than your mutant Neanderthal uni-brow. So you might want to stick with one of the first three options.

If you eliminate choices #3 and #4 on the grounds that you’re heterosexual and not from the Deep South, you might as well make peace with the fact that you’re gonna have to learn to deal with chicks.

Or buy hand-lotion from a bulk warehouse store. It’s your choice.

Your rating: None Average: 3.9 (12 votes)

Comments

this site is shit

I think this site is hilarious. not just hilarious, but nearly everything they say is - sorry to say (cause I’m a girl)- true!
I’m not bitter or jaded but I agree with most of what is here.
it’s educational. and they’re right. you clearly can’t handle the TRUTH!!
ROCK ON!!

but hes from BR or something

My last sexual relationship was the 14th of august 2002. I’ve been on irregular masturbation for the last 7 years. My friends call me the vicar. Bad dates after bad dates, first i get stuck to not going back, no matter how growing the urge. You get used to it and the need gets less strong after 3-4 years. Maybe my sex drive is not as strong, but i am still sane, the desire is still here, but i think with my upper head before the lower one easier. 99.99% of men would say i am lying and that this is no life. Some monks in China live in mountains and break rocks all their life, go and tell them they have “no life”.

this site is the saviour of all men fucked ova by women or all men jus about to be fucked ova by a woman

Personally I think an animal is a good choice LOL and its also not illegal in quite a few countries. :D

you forgot to mention fleshlights :p

Men, if you consider how much hassle and money you MUST invest in a woman today just to have sex, well the best option is: Prostitution! the reasons why?
1) you may choose the chicks you like!
2) you know what you’ll have for sure when you pay
3) prostitute cost as a dinner, the “little” difference is that whit the cost of a “dinner” with women you are not sure to score, with them this is totally sure! no hidden fees!
4) …and you see what you get! in many women you don’t!
5) If sex hillness with a prostitute is a problem, ask yourself why today you MUST use condoms with “normal” women too!
6) many prostitutes may give you the same emotional sensations as your lovely lady daily gives to you between a “dear” and “honey”
8) you may have all the channels you wish with a prostitute, many “normal” women don’t like that you “see” some channel..(until you are not the horny plumber they fuck while you are at work, of course!)
7) both of them get money in the process.. but when the game it’s over, only one want from you home, assets and money! guess who?

end of the line: DO NOT MARRY until eneven laws and chicks will change! otherwise.. you will be the only one to be fucked hard!

If you choose this non-option, NEVER go with a coworker! The others will get jealous until the inevitable breakup. Then the one you went with will blab everything and make stuff, smearing you.

…is sex with women, but without any baggage. You do this by only having short-term relationships. Once the excitement of a new woman starts to wane, you move on. It’s not that hard, you just stop calling and they’ll break up or they’ll freak out and then you break up.

Believe it or not, this is what women of today want, it’s one of the things they’ve been fighting for by wanting more sexual freedom. Women don’t want to be the gatekeepers of sex any more, and I think that’s great. Who doesn’t love sluts? I love them, I absolutely love them… I just would never marry one or let one get me down.

Now, the important thing is that there’s a quid pro quo that men have to remember. If woman want to shed their sexual gatekeeper responsibilities, then men no longer have to feel responsible as the gatekeepers of commitment.

Just remember, always use condoms, even if she says she’s on BC.

Your comment is absolutely repulsive! Yes, women have fought for sexual freedom, but that doesn’t mean that they want to be used and spat out….frankly I don’t think anyone wants to feel that way. Women have fought for sexual freedom so that people like you don’t call them sluts for having,what people would consider, “a lot” of sex.

Look, it’s not that hard to understand. The upsides associated with being in a relationship with a (most) woman are now outweighed by the downsides. Men are “Doing the math” and the numbers no longer come out in favor of women. Most of the single/divorced men I know are classic “nice guys.” Not most, but EVERY one of them has been crapped on and treated disrespectfully by women they were dating. It has been truly amazing to watch. I suspect that these good men simply don’t provide women with the “drama” they need. Whatever the reason, all of them have found that they have more peace - and in turn, happiness - flying solo. The funny thing about it is that they aren’t bitter about it. They are just done trying, and they are actually happy.

So, maybe someday women wi figure out precisely what it is they want - from life and from men - and things will improve. Maybe.

Until then, we hope you women find happiness. We really do.

Testosterone + Logic = This Page

Don’t believe that dialectic bullshit.
Option 5: Hyper-Realistic Love Dolls
Followed VERY soon by Hyper-Realistic sex bots. All action. No bullshit STDs, pregnancy, lies, cheating, manipulation, false rape accusation, life-destroying insanity. NONE of that!
Females are going to lose their fucking MINDS when they are obsolete.

Pages

Add new comment

Filtered HTML

  • Allowed HTML tags: <em> <strong> <cite> <code> <ul> <ol> <li> <dl> <dt> <dd> <color> <size>
  • Non-latin text (e.g., å, ö, 漢) will be converted to US-ASCII equivalents (a, o, ?).
  • Typographic refinements will be added.
  • Lines and paragraphs break automatically.

Plain text

  • Allowed HTML tags: <a> <em> <strong> <cite> <blockquote> <code> <ul> <ol> <li> <dl> <dt> <dd>
  • No HTML tags allowed.
  • Non-latin text (e.g., å, ö, 漢) will be converted to US-ASCII equivalents (a, o, ?).
By submitting this form, you accept the Mollom privacy policy.