understanding women - they're fucking crazy.

Despite protestations against being "objectified," deep down inside, nearly every woman wants to be thought of as exactly that: A sex object. One that's sexually attractive enough to make men lose their fucking minds. No matter how feministic, liberated or highly educated women are, they still want to be thought of as sexy (the educated ones really want to be slutty).

Even tight-assed woman aren't immune to that kind of sexist flattery, the sole exception being the woman who is already objectified. (That's why strippers always want to be loved "for their minds." Bitches are just never fucking happy.)

What Our Mothers Didn't Tell Us: Why Happiness Eludes the Modern Woman.

Too many women live in a bizarro world where common sense has gone AWOL without leaving a forwarding address. In this world, a woman expects men to be strong and decisive while doing things exactly the way she wants them done. You know, the right way.

Women from this planet also want men to be able to read their minds. To know when what they're feeling all the time, and to support them unconditionally no matter how wrong or stupid they are.

If that weren't enough proof that women come down on the wrong side of the sanity fence, there's more. Say you're dating a girl and everything is going fine when, for no good reason, she dumps you. But later begs you to take her back. What the hell's going on? Drama, friend. Chicks love the shit. Some women just can't live without drama and will go out of their way to actually create problems if things are going too smoothly in a relationship. They have to shake things up, figuring, the higher the drama, the stronger the love. If that sounds insane, it's because it is. We rest our case, your honor.