The four main kinds of women.

In the broadest possible sense, there are four general personality groups that most women fall into. This isn’t to say there aren’t exceptions to this “rule,” just that we don’t have the time or space to delve into the myriad of female mental states on an individual level.

The groups are, in no particular order: Superficial, Domestic, Emotional and Effing Crazy.

All four personality types have equal good and bad attributes, so there isn't any one type is better than any other — which is best for you depends on you. After all, the heart of compatibility is finding the type of girl who suits you best, not most guys.

Again, we’re talking broad generalizations (pun intended) here, so don’t base any life-altering decisions on this information like it’s fucking gospel.

SUPERFICIAL - (AQUARIUS, LIBRA, GEMINI)

• These aren't your deep, introspective girls. They get along with everybody, but it’s all surface level. These are your fun girls. And that’s probably why they're constantly surrounded by guys. Everyone loves them — they’re smart, good-humored and social. As a bonus, they’re not prudes, either. If you want to make a play for one, keep it light, casual and funny. If you get all serious and bring her down, she won’t hesitate to shut you down and move on.

DOMESTIC - (CAPRICORN, TAURUS, VIRGO)

• Domestics are your salt-of-the-earth types. Practical, dependable, generally what most guys think of when they want a girl who’s “real." Domestics are approachable and straight-forward; what-you-see-is-what-you-get. So the best approach with one of these girls is to be the same way. Don’t just blurt out that you want to fuck her. You have to “prove” your way into these girls’ pants by doing some work for it. But be upfront and honest, they tend to spook easily.

EMOTIONAL - (SCORPIO, PISCES, CANCER)

• These are your archetypal “female”-types. Sensitive and intuitive, they’re all about feelings and shit. Moody and into sulking, these are your deep, intense girls. They want to see your sensitive side, in fact, that’s pretty much all they want to see. Go in ready to do a lot of listening, apologizing (and ducking).

EFFING CRAZY - (SAGITTARIUS, ARIES, LEO)

• These bitches are fucking gonzo. They aren’t your wallflower-type. They’re crazy, unpredictable girls who are up for anything. They grab life by the cojones and squeeze. They’re tornados with vaginas. Lots of fun for the right kind of guy, but they’re demanding chicks who get pissed fast. Commonly viewed as “bitches” by sensitive guys and other women, these girls require you to cowboy-up and approach them like a winner. They don’t want to see your sensitive side. They want a man who knows what he wants.

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