So the solution to World Peace has finally been discovered. And it’s surprisingly simple: More women. Which is funny, because I always thought women were the problem. Turns out, the real problem was a lack of women.
According to a recent article in BusinessWeek, when you “put a bunch of male rats in a cage with no females, give them plenty of food, and they get along like they’re on some sort of male sensitivity retreat.” Apparently, without women around, men have no need to compete (and by compete, they mean kill each other).
In one monkey tribe with a high female-to-male ratio, aggression “was far less frequent. There was more reciprocal grooming and hanging out, and females were less defensive now that there were more of them. But most surprising, outsider aggressor males that joined the tribe quickly adapted…becoming less aggressive and more social as well.”
The obvious, but hard-to-believe conclusion: More women means more peace.
If there were shitloads of chicks everywhere, men wouldn’t have to compete for them. When there’s more supply, there’s less demand, and less demand means fewer arrogant bitches (Yeah, I’m talking to you, Paris).
So if you’re planning to burden society with yet another screaming crap-machine, at least try to have a female one. For the sake of world peace. The future will thank you.