Turns out that talking too much on a cellphone kills your sperm.
In a recent study, scientists found that “men who used a cell phone more than four hours a day produced…23 percent less [sperm] than those…who didn’t use the phones at all.“
You see, that’s what–waitaminute…FOUR hours a day!? Are you fucking kidding me!? Who the hell talks for 4 hours a day… period!?
Cellphone conversations shouldn’t take more :30 seconds at MOST—just long enough to say, “Hey, there’s a goddamn land-line right next to me, why don’t I call you right back on that so you can actually hear what I’m saying?”
If you talk longer than thirty seconds on a cellphone, you’re either Lindsey Lohan, or a damn lazy bastard. And either way, you don’t deserve to have kids.
Infertility is just another ONE of the innumerable reasons people need to keep their fucking yaps closed unless it’s a matter of life or death.
Or, you know, if Lindsey calls…