What to know about our so-called privacy policy.

Worried that we’re tracking your movements and selling your personal information to blood-sucking data brokers? Good for you.

It’s pretty simple actually. We don’t really have one… Well, not officially. (Have any idea how much lawyers charge for that kind of thing? Hell, we can’t even afford my brother…) But here’s the gist of what passes for our “policy.”

When you visit our site, we do not purposely write any “cookies” to your hard drive outside of what our CMS system, Drupal, writes to provide functionality. The advertising platforms we use, like Google, LinkShare, AdEngage, AdultAdworld, et al, write a cookie or seven so they don’t keep showing you the same ads over and over again. But we don’t have much control over that (and any control we may have we’re too lazy to do anything about). Also, our affiliate advertisers probably set cookies, too. Plus, we also use Google Analytics to see which pages are popular, which ones need work, what size screens most people use, and other statistical shit like that.

Rest assured, we have no interest in blowing hours and hours of our personal time learning how to write sneaky tracking code. Frankly, we don’t care enough to find out who you are, or to track your movements on the web (but use PrivacyChoice to opt out of being tracked by the companies who do).

Unlike you, we’ve got lives.

And, if you email us with a question or suggestion, we promise not to inundate you with spam or other crapulent solicitations. Why? Because we think companies that do that suck donkey-wangs. So we won’t be choking your email in-box with porno ads or selling your email address to the Russian Mafia, either.

Actually, to be perfectly honest, we don’t want you coming back (more than a few times anyway). If you do, that just means this site didn’t help you and so we didn’t do our job which, frankly, doesn’t make us look very good.

So look around and read some articles confident that 3 months from now you won’t be getting “Still can’t get laid?” emails.